I wanted to just walk away from this
from you and everything that hurt so bad
wanted to pretend that the fear I felt
was from the chance of having to face the outside world alone
but reality set in
And I realized that the fear was not outside
but contained within these four walls
a fear that ran so deep that a times
I felt like my heart would stop beating
because of how hard it was breathing
there were times when I thought
today would be the day that things go too far
the worst part is that I've planned for that day
arrangments are made, kids have a place to stay
and I a final resting place
yet, today wasn't that day
because there was an inner strength from within
that rose so far so fast
that when I looked in the mirror
I promised me
today would be the last of this kind of hurt and your kind of pain
no longer living with thoughts of love misconstrued
determined to unweave the webs of
mental, physical and emotional abuse
determined to be a survivor at all cost
and I will
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